How to write a 300 page book on a 1 page topic

[CeeKay]

sorry, got to fight you on that one.  there's only one of us fit for such a task, one filled with so much compassion, such goodwill and giving and caring he'd be perfect for the job.

Spoiler for Hiden:

gellar

[brettmcd]

Listen, when Zeke comes back...and we all know it's a matter of when, not if...we need to create a new role for someone here on GT.  

The Zeke Whisperer.  

This person will be in charge of talking him down when he gets that frustrated.  

We will pay him in used tires and gummi bears.

...I nominate brettmcd.

I appreciate your consideration of me for this role but I would have to politely decline such a role as it would.....   Wait did you say gummi bears.....   Ill get back to you.

[Scraper]

The Zeke Whisperer. AWESOME.

[McBa1n]

I have been entertained.

[Moliere]

Obama sent in the military and held the government of Hawaii at gunpoint, but they have finally released the long form of his birth certificate. Congratz birthers you got your wish. What will you complain about next?

[Scraper]

Thank you for putting this stupid thing to rest. Now on to the next Tea Bag, I mean Party, non-issue, Obama is a MUSLIM. RUN AND HIDE, kids get under your desk. 

[Razgon]

okay, I jumped over the passages where people were figthing like crazy, but remind me again... WHY is it so important where Obama was born? Isnt he a US citizen no matter what soil was beneath his mother when she gave birth?

[Scraper]

okay, I jumped over the passages where people were figthing like crazy, but remind me again... WHY is it so important where Obama was born? Isnt he a US citizen no matter what soil was beneath his mother when she gave birth?

In short, our Constitution requires that you be a natural citizen in order to be the President. I.E. you weren't a citizen of any other country prior to being a citizen of the U.S.

[Teggy]

okay, I jumped over the passages where people were figthing like crazy, but remind me again... WHY is it so important where Obama was born? Isnt he a US citizen no matter what soil was beneath his mother when she gave birth?

It's a technicality. It has to do with what the law was at the time he was born and the fact that his mother was only 18. If she was 21 at the time, it would have met the requirement (had to have been living in the US for at least 5 years following her 16th birthday).

[Razgon]

okay, I jumped over the passages where people were figthing like crazy, but remind me again... WHY is it so important where Obama was born? Isnt he a US citizen no matter what soil was beneath his mother when she gave birth?

In short, our Constitution requires that you be a natural citizen in order to be the President. I.E. you weren't a citizen of any other country prior to being a citizen of the U.S.

Ah, like how Schwarzenegger isnt able to become President, like Sylvester Stallone makes a jab at in his Demolition Man? See, you CAN learn from movies ;-)

[kadnod]

Congratz birthers you got your wish. What will you complain about next?

On the certificate, there's some stray ink in the space where it lists if someone is a triplet.  Could Obama have two secret, identical siblings?  And if so, how, exactly, are we supposed to know which one is in the White House?  What if they all are?

Drop the BS, Mr. Presidents.  I can't consider any of you my leader without detailed photos of your mothers' uterus, so I can personally inspect them for the trauma normally associated with multiple births. Until then, you tri-bastards better stay off the ballot in my state!

[CeeKay]

it's only a model.

[Moliere]

[Shkspr]

Well, of COURSE Obama could release his birth certificate NOW.  Keeping that thing private isn't going to prevent identity theft now that the hackers have his PSN account information.

[CeeKay]

his mother's name was Stanley?

[Purge]

his mother's name was Stanley?

Isn't everybody's?

[CeeKay]

his mother's name was Stanley?

Isn't everybody's?

mine was 01100111 01100101 01101111 01110010 01100111 01101001 01100001 01101110 01101110 01100001.

[hepcat]

And the scumbag Trump feels proud about being a scumbag.

The man continuously displays an almost psychotic break from reality when it comes to narcissism.  He could kill a hooker and eat her remains and the next day he'd simply release a press statement praising himself for helping to clean up the streets and for being a leader in the field of conservation.  

[naednek]

If only he waited one more day.  Then Zeke could have said I TOLD YOU SO

[Alefroth]

If only he waited one more day.  Then Zeke could have said I TOLD YOU SO

Maybe Zeke was spending his little vacation getting on the Prez's case.

Ale

[Alefroth]

In a way, the birthers are vindicated. He could have released it earlier if he'd really tried.

Ale

[McBa1n]

I'm disappointed in this development of the President releasing his birth certificate. I rathered the racist right crying about where the President was born and marginalizing themselves into 'crazy', as opposed to being pissed off someone is building a mosque 10 blocks from ground zero, and being hypocritical in regards to their loyalty to the constitution.
I wonder what the next 'bigtime' weapon of mass distraction will be to get the teabaggers fired up will be. I'm praying it will be a legit one like getting fired up at Goldman Sachs robbing our country of billions. Heck, I wish ANYONE with a major voice would get on this topic.

[kratz]

Michael Ian Black Tweets: "Birth certificate/smirth certificate, here's the thing that's actually troubling me about Obama: he's black."

[hepcat]

Ah, the song of idiots.


p.s. by the way, zeke's posting over at OO now.  when's his temp ban over?  this thread isn't complete without his input on the birth certificate being produced. 

[Purge]

You see the patchwork on his scalp? Look forward to fantastic governing.

[Moliere]

And the scumbag Trump feels proud about being a scumbag.

The man continuously displays an almost psychotic break from reality when it comes to narcissism.  He could kill a hooker and eat her remains and the next day he'd simply release a press statement praising himself for helping to clean up the streets and for being a leader in the field of conservation.  

Trump Unable To Produce Certificate Proving He's Not A Festering Pile Of Shit

[Flatlander]

Ah, the song of idiots.

      Thanks a lot, Tea Party.   I used to be able to call myself a Patriotic American without people thinking I'm a fucking lunatic.   You've hijacked love of Country and turned it into a political conspiracy theory.

[Autistic Angel]

You can't make this stuff up.

In a statement after Obama spoke, Republican National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus called the issue a distraction — and yet blamed Obama for playing campaign politics by addressing it.

"The president ought to spend his time getting serious about repairing our economy," Priebus said. "Unfortunately his campaign politics and talk about birth certificates is distracting him from our number one priority — our economy."

-Autistic Angel

[hepcat]

I know this really pisses off the birthers and other folks who claim that Obama's birth place was in question, and that it's become a knee jerk response to these allegations in some circles, but I actually do believe that the impetus for much of the debate is steeped in racism.  

We've had about 5 previous presidents with at least one immigrant parent.  At no point in history do I recall ever reading about a controversy over a president's place of birth before Obama though.  Maybe I just haven't come across any stories of controversy in this area, but in the back of my mind I can't help but think that maybe this is because we now have a president who is so obviously NOT white?  

And before anyone accuses me of using a broad paintbrush to paint all anti-Obama folks as racists, I just want to stress that I don't believe that everyone who was involved in the whole birther debacle is racist...

...no, they're just not terribly bright.  

[Ironrod]

We've had about 5 previous presidents with at least one immigrant parent.  At no point in history do I recall ever reading about a controversy over a president's place of birth before Obama though.

How far back were those? Hospital births didn't start to become normal until after WW2. Earlier generations were born at home without documentation. Proving one's age didn't become important until social security was introduced. So if you're going back beyond the second half of the 20th century, birth records were based on hearsay.

My dad's birth certificate (issued many years after the fact) said he was born in 1924. His mother claimed that 1922 was right. He maintained that he got screwed out of two years of social security due to a bureaucratic error. We were never sure exactly how old he was.

[Moliere]

And before anyone accuses me of using a broad paintbrush to paint all anti-Obama folks as racists, I just want to stress that I don't believe that everyone who was involved in the whole birther debacle is racist...

...no, they're just not terribly bright.  

I'm sure they will appreciate your generosity in not calling them all racists, but instead that they're all stupid. 

[Scraper]

Fox News had a whole slew of "experts" on yesterday trying to point out that the certificate is a fake. I hope they keep going down that path because it makes them look even more insane than most people already think they are.

[Teggy]

Fox News had a whole slew of "experts" on yesterday trying to point out that the certificate is a fake. I hope they keep going down that path because it makes them look even more insane than most people already think they are.

You should see that birthers.org site today. Apparently Obama has simply fallen into their "trap".

[CeeKay]

well it's only a piece of paper, and you can put anything you want on paper.

 

[raydude]

And before anyone accuses me of using a broad paintbrush to paint all anti-Obama folks as racists, I just want to stress that I don't believe that everyone who was involved in the whole birther debacle is racist...

...no, they're just not terribly bright.  

I'm sure they will appreciate your generosity in not calling them all racists, but instead that they're all stupid. 

I would settle for calling them 'incredibly obstinate in the face of overwhelming facts'

[Isgrimnur]

Too many words.  "Willfully ignorant."

[hepcat]

And before anyone accuses me of using a broad paintbrush to paint all anti-Obama folks as racists, I just want to stress that I don't believe that everyone who was involved in the whole birther debacle is racist...

...no, they're just not terribly bright.  

I'm sure they will appreciate your generosity in not calling them all racists, but instead that they're all stupid.  

well, to be fair...not ALL of them are either racists or stupid...

...some of them are mentally handicapped.

Fox News had a whole slew of "experts" on yesterday trying to point out that the certificate is a fake. I hope they keep going down that path because it makes them look even more insane than most people already think they are.

You should see that birthers.org site today. Apparently Obama has simply fallen into their "trap".

  priceless!

[Gratch]

Fox News had a whole slew of "experts" on yesterday trying to point out that the certificate is a fake. I hope they keep going down that path because it makes them look even more insane than most people already think they are.

You should see that birthers.org site today. Apparently Obama has simply fallen into their "trap".

Wow.  That site is a level of derpiness that I can't even begin to comprehend.

[Flatlander]

Fox News had a whole slew of "experts" on yesterday trying to point out that the certificate is a fake. I hope they keep going down that path because it makes them look even more insane than most people already think they are.

You should see that birthers.org site today. Apparently Obama has simply fallen into their "trap".

Did anyone seriously think they wouldn't immediately move the goal posts?  Engaging hard core conspiracy theorists and trying to deal with them like rational people only lends them unearned credibility.  What everyone else views as evidence of President Obama's birth actually occuring in a Honolulu Hospital is to the Birthers just more evidence of the vast evil conspiracy only they can see. (why did he release it now? I know in my Patriot's heart it is a fake.  I have information from an unnamed Patriot source that there is a printing press similar to the one used to create 1960's era Hawaiian Vital documents located somewhere in the depths of uncharted Canada!  The serial number is lower than one issued a day earlier so that means it a fake because stacks of forms never get shuffled. etc etc)

Talking to the Birthers is just like trying to reason with the folks who believe in Bigfoot, the Loch Ness Monster or the great Leprechaun Invasion of 1974.     

[Isgrimnur]

I had an uncle that lost a leg to those blasted Leprechauns!  Don't you dare try to tell me that it never happened!  You're a part of the government's conspiracy to cover up that war and the existence of the Wee Folk, those bastards!