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Author Topic: Wife Issue (Advice?)  (Read 5021 times)
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jpinard
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« Reply #40 on: June 29, 2008, 05:50:06 AM »

My cat has a myspace page - I do not.
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Zaxxon
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« Reply #41 on: June 29, 2008, 06:35:24 AM »

Quote from: Jag on June 29, 2008, 01:34:37 AM

Just think how much she would flip out if she knew you posted this thread on the internet.  icon_eek

Winnar.  smile 
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Shkspr
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« Reply #42 on: June 29, 2008, 06:42:15 PM »

Quote from: Toe on June 29, 2008, 03:28:52 AM

If I were you I would be pissed off and would take a firm stand on the issue. The stand being: "You are being unreasonable and it is pissing me off. If you honestly think there is, or every will be, the slightest possibility of me hooking up with this person then you do not even know me and are basically shitting on everything I have put into our relationship. So get the fucking idea out of your head now and do not bring it up again. Because there is no reason to."

That does it.  Now I'm totally convinced YK is nailing this chick.  Guilty people always try to turn it back on the people who see though their lies.

EDIT for YellowQueen:  No, he's not really nailing the chick.
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msduncan
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« Reply #43 on: June 29, 2008, 08:05:06 PM »

Dude, YK -- you said on here you broke it off with this chick months ago!   nod

Edit:   JUST KIDDING YellowQueen.   YK is telling the truth..we're just giving him a hard time.
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tgb1.1
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« Reply #44 on: June 29, 2008, 09:50:48 PM »

Hey, Yellowqueen
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PR_GMR
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« Reply #45 on: June 30, 2008, 04:53:57 PM »

Quote from: Daehawk on June 27, 2008, 11:06:30 PM

I cant help you. I just had to delete my whole gmail account due to something silly. In part I grabbed the new Firefox 3 when it came out. It removed my googlebar unknown to me. Im surfing the net and reading up on a EQ2 quest. My wife comes in and gives me a kiss. I tell her to sit down on my lap and look at this stuff. Its then that I see a popup with a porn name on it. I haven't had a popup in at least 5 years! Googlebar blocked them all! So I freak and try to hit it to close it real fast. I know my wife will shit if she sees it. So as she is turning to the screen I hit it..OOPS I open the page it links to full screen. theres a naked woman all bent over full on..SHIT. I close it but its too late. Damn thing. Wife was mad all damn day. Took me forever to explain popups and how they work. Worst luck in history. Doesn't help that all she has ever heard about the internet is cybersex and chat rooms.

 icon_lol icon_lol

YK, as for your wife, I think Mr Fed said it best. Women's emotional tides are unfathomable--Best to profusely apologize and move on.
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Harkonis
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« Reply #46 on: June 30, 2008, 05:08:36 PM »

This sets off all kinds of red flag alerts to me from past experiences.  Though obviously not always the case, many times when people over-react like that it's because they themselves feel how they are accusing you of feeling.  Her insecurities towards your simple message to this girl may reflect something deeper in her own feelings.

Or it could just be that time slywink
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Freezer-TPF-
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« Reply #47 on: June 30, 2008, 05:11:50 PM »

Quote from: Mr. Fed
There's no point in being right, thinking about whether you are right, or wondering if the reaction is unreasonable.  Apologize for not considering how it would make her feel (a perfectly honest apology, in that you also didn't consider what impact your actions might have had on subatomic particles hitherto undiscovered and unknown by science) and move on.

Truer words...

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Freezer-TPF-
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« Reply #48 on: June 30, 2008, 05:12:18 PM »

Quote from: jpinard on June 29, 2008, 05:50:06 AM

My cat has a myspace page - I do not.

This is an early candidate for the post of the week.
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kadnod
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« Reply #49 on: June 30, 2008, 05:55:11 PM »

Are you still playing D&D with her?  If so, perhaps this can be smoothed over with electrum pieces?
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Jolor
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« Reply #50 on: June 30, 2008, 06:00:54 PM »

Hey - are y'all on sbcglobal?  Just curious.
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GGMark
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« Reply #51 on: June 30, 2008, 06:02:58 PM »

it seems we all had issues this week.

So my ex moved out about 4 months ago, had to move in with her dad.  Who had abused her in the past, and I told her to make sure she call if she anything happened.  We are on semi speaking terms.  I had made it very clear to my current GF that this was the case. and she said she was fine with that.

So I log into WoW the other day, which my ex played, and even her guild hadnt seen her in two weeks.  So I sent the ex a text asking if she was ok, and that no one had seen her....except becuase my phone is all buggy for some stupid reason, it skipped names in my phonebook, and sent to to the current GF.

My first reaction was to send a text saying that i had meant to send it to a guy i talk to and work with, who no one had seen recerntly......which made the whole situation worse....

long story short....i am in the dog house, prolly for awhile.  for lieing, and not really even doing antying that I didnt have permission to do anywas...frown

hope ya work things out.

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kratz
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« Reply #52 on: June 30, 2008, 09:46:59 PM »

Quote from: Harkonis on June 30, 2008, 05:08:36 PM

This sets off all kinds of red flag alerts to me from past experiences. 

That time some guy in your Counter Strike clan got mad at you because he thought you were letting him get killed totally does not apply here.
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chaosraven
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« Reply #53 on: June 30, 2008, 11:34:37 PM »

For bonus points, make sure you call her by the other womans name in a nonsexual setting.

Then deny you did it when she flips out.

-Springer 3:16

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PeteRock
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« Reply #54 on: June 30, 2008, 11:45:25 PM »

I have learned that male reasoning and female reasoning work in very different ways.  As an example, one weeknight I met Moliere to play pool.  I told my wife where I was going, what I was doing, and who I would be with.  I said I'd try to be home around 11pm, but odds were that we'd have one of our usual competitive marathons and I might be home later.

As the night wore on I was playing fairly well.  I was always within a game or two of Moliere and saw an opportunity to potentially finish the night ahead.  Because my wife knew where I was, what I was doing, and who I was with, I didn't think anything of the fact that 11pm came and went.  

A little after 1am I remember making a rather difficult shot, and when I turned around to see Moliere's reaction, I instead turned to face my wife who was standing behind me in that "I'm about to get medieval on your ass" posture.   icon_eek

I was immediately berated because she was "concerned" about whether I was "dead in a ditch somewhere", "off to tent prison for a DUI", or "out at a strip club."  She "didn't know where I was or what I was doing."   icon_confused  

When I asked if she recalled our earlier conversation covering where I'd be, what I'd be doing, and who I'd be with, she argued that she couldn't know that was what I was still doing.   icon_confused  

One lesson I learned was that even though I made it painfully clear what my plans were for the night, where I'd be, and who I'd be with, apparently a phone call to reiterate exactly what I had discussed earlier was a requirement in order to verify that I wasn't "dead in a ditch somewhere, "off to tent prison for a DUI", or "out at a strip club."  Even though I was exactly where I said I would be, doing exactly what I said I'd be doing, and with exactly who I said I'd be with.  

I also learned that an apology consisting of, "I am sorry that you overreacted and I am sorry that you apparently didn't listen to my explanation earlier of where I'd be, what I'd be doing, and who I'd be with, and that you obviously don't trust me" wasn't exactly what she was looking for.

My advice?  Listen to Fed.  Women's thought processes work far differently from our own.  While I felt I did all that was necessary by informing my wife what my plans were for the night and then following through on exactly what I had described, apparently an additional phone call, while not detailed in our original discussion, went without saying.  On occasion I'll get up to use the rest room and my wife will ask me where I'm going.  I'll explain that I am going to the rest room, I am planning to go "number 2", and I'll be back when I am finished.  And while inside, if my trip lasts longer than anticipated, I'll call her from my cell phone and explain that things were taking a little longer than expected but I should be back to the living room soon.  When she asks why the hell I felt the need to call her to tell her that I'll remind her of the pool hall episode and that I just wanted to make sure she knew I wasn't dead in a ditch somewhere or at a strip club.  That rarely ends well, but it makes me feel better.   icon_twisted  
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Geezer
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« Reply #55 on: July 01, 2008, 12:24:26 AM »

What the hell is wrong with some of you people?

Courtesy to your SO I completely understand and agree with.  Asking "permission" to do stuff?  Blocking someone wholly innocent from contacting you?   She's your wife, not your mother.

Jeebus.
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gellar
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« Reply #56 on: July 01, 2008, 12:35:36 AM »

Quote from: Geezer on July 01, 2008, 12:24:26 AM

What the hell is wrong with some of you people?

Courtesy to your SO I completely understand and agree with.  Asking "permission" to do stuff?  Blocking someone wholly innocent from contacting you?   She's your wife, not your mother.

Jeebus.

Agreed wholeheartedly, but apparently this makes us selfish according to most around here.

gellar
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YellowKing
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« Reply #57 on: July 01, 2008, 12:55:38 AM »

Quote
Blocking someone wholly innocent from contacting you?   She's your wife, not your mother.

In this instance, the person contacting me was *definitely* not worth fighting with my wife over. I hadn't talked to her in 15 years, felt no urge to contact her in 15 years, so it wasn't like this was a good friend who I was suddenly losing. While I agree that the whole thing is silly, you have to choose your battles. This one was definitely not worth going to war over.
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Sarkus
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« Reply #58 on: July 01, 2008, 01:03:51 AM »

Another thing to put on my ever expanding list of reasons why I'll never get married.
 Roll Eyes
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rickfc
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« Reply #59 on: July 01, 2008, 01:48:19 AM »

Quote from: gellar on July 01, 2008, 12:35:36 AM


Agreed wholeheartedly, but apparently this makes us selfish according to most around here.

gellar

Agreed.  I've had to give and take in these kinds of situations with my wife in the past.  You just have to choose your battles.
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YellowKing
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« Reply #60 on: July 01, 2008, 02:45:11 AM »

Quote
Another thing to put on my ever expanding list of reasons why I'll never get married.

It has nothing to do with marriage, it's just women in general. Unless you decide to go gay or become a masturbating hermit, you'll have to deal with it eventually.  icon_biggrin
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gellar
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« Reply #61 on: July 01, 2008, 03:02:40 AM »

Quote from: YellowKing on July 01, 2008, 02:45:11 AM

Quote
Another thing to put on my ever expanding list of reasons why I'll never get married.

It has nothing to do with marriage, it's just women in general. Unless you decide to go gay or become a masturbating hermit, you'll have to deal with it eventually.  icon_biggrin

I have an intriguing way of dealing with it.  It's called 'Hey, there's the door.  Would you like me to show you how it opens?'

This is all in theory, I've never had to use it since my girlfriend is oddly rational for a woman.

gellar
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YellowKing
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« Reply #62 on: July 01, 2008, 11:23:21 AM »

You can't throw away a 12-year relationship over something so minor, just because you're a "big bad man and don't let no woman boss you around".
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Geezer
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« Reply #63 on: July 01, 2008, 01:01:18 PM »

Quote from: YellowKing on July 01, 2008, 11:23:21 AM

You can't throw away a 12-year relationship over something so minor, just because you're a "big bad man and don't let no woman boss you around".

I agree that it's not worth throwing a relationship away over.  But it's not a matter of not "let[ting] no woman boss you around" nor, IMHO, is it minor.

You are being told, without basis, who you can and cannot talk to.  You put a physical block on someone else's ability to leave you the equivalent of an email, because your SO demanded it, either implicitly or explicitly.  While I understand that keeping your wife happy is infinitely more important than getting an email from this person, is keeping your wife happy in the short term more important than your own reasonable self-determination in the long term?
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Razgon
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« Reply #64 on: July 01, 2008, 01:18:43 PM »

Give and take, consideration for ones SO is the major issue here, and its not an issue for the grand court to make legislation off...

Dont let every little thing be the "OMG haxxors my life" incident...its just life, you deal with it on a daily basis, not on some sort of "grand-scale"...
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IkeVandergraaf
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« Reply #65 on: July 01, 2008, 01:33:12 PM »

Let's get back on topic here.  What EQ2 quest were you looking up, Daehawk, when porno popped up on your screen, and how did that result in you having to delete your gmail account?
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