http://gamingtrend.com
September 16, 2014, 09:53:27 PM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
News:
 
   Home   Help Search Calendar Login Register  
Poll
Question: So, what would YOU do?  (Voting closed: April 15, 2005, 11:17:15 PM)
Give her the cash. - 5 (13.2%)
Give her the book back. - 30 (78.9%)
Loan her the money. - 1 (2.6%)
Tell her, "No." - 2 (5.3%)
Total Voters: 37

Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: What would YOU do?  (Read 1634 times)
0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
CrayolaSmoker
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 3614

Sponge Bath Slut


View Profile WWW
« on: April 15, 2005, 11:17:15 PM »

Got a phone call this morning from a classmate of mine that has me in a quandry.  The story goes a little something like this:

Last August, we started nursing school.  On our list of things to buy was the drug guide of our choice (that will carry you 'till May 2006).  About three weeks into the semester, I still hadn't purchased one and my friend had two - one she liked and one she wasn't terribly fond of.  She gave me the one she wasn't very fond of.  I told her I'd give it back whenever I got around to buying my own.  She told me not to worry about it.

Whenever drug books came up last semester in conversation, I'd always mention the one I had as being on loan from my classmate.  Without fail, she'd tell me she gave it to me, and it was mine to keep.  After hearing this several times, I stopped saying it was on loan and began to think of it as my own.

Cut back to this morning, where she calls and says, "Remember that drug book I gave you?  Do you think you could pay me for it?  I've lost mine and need to get a new one."

She then went on to tell me she doesn't have the money to get a new one (forgetting that I know she and her husband are planning trips to Las Vegas and Aruba this summer.  She also asked me if I thought she was "being mean," which hints that she thinks what she's asking isn't exactly fair.

Anyway, what would you folks do in this situation?  I've got an idea of how I should play it, but I'm looking for unbiased input to either validate what I'm thinking, or put my head on straight if I'm wrong.  biggrin
Logged

Wii: 1429 3414 0674 4114 | 360: CrayolaSmokerGT
smokingcrayolas.net | surrogacy blog
gameoverman
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 1422


View Profile
« Reply #1 on: April 15, 2005, 11:38:01 PM »

I voted give her the book back.

Since she's a 'classmate' and not a 'friend',  I think that's the fairest thing. In fact, that's the 'going the extra mile to be nice' thing to do.  No way should she expect you to pay her anything, that ship has sailed long ago.  You could say "No" and keep the book, but if it were me I wouldn't play it that way.  That's too close to being spiteful for my blood, it's not worth it imo.

Even if you have to buy a book now after giving this one back, you are still way ahead of the game having had use of it all this time.

Spiffy vacations or no spiffy vacations, she shows a distinct lack of class asking for money now.  

She should relied on her brownie points with you and asked for the loan of cash.  If I were in your shoes and she did that, I'd bend over backwards to help her, in appreciation for the use of the book(assuming I had the cash).  If I didn't have the cash, I'd give her the book with a smile and many thanks.

Having her ask for payment for which she is not entitled though, that's low.
Logged
CrayolaSmoker
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 3614

Sponge Bath Slut


View Profile WWW
« Reply #2 on: April 16, 2005, 12:29:28 AM »

Quote from: "gameoverman"
Since she's a 'classmate' and not a 'friend',  I think that's the fairest thing.


Last semester she was, without a doubt, my best friend and partner in crime.  This semester we've grown a bit apart due to various circumstances, but are still friends.  Does that change your answer?
Logged

Wii: 1429 3414 0674 4114 | 360: CrayolaSmokerGT
smokingcrayolas.net | surrogacy blog
dbt1949
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 2619


Don't tread on me


View Profile
« Reply #3 on: April 16, 2005, 12:52:35 AM »

Friends and "business" don't mix. Give her book back to her and say "thanks for the loan". Buy yourself a new book and be coldly polite to her from now on. Your friendship,if there really was one,is kaput.
Of course I'm an olde and bitter man.  :wink:
Logged

Ye Olde Farte
stiffler
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 4071


View Profile WWW
« Reply #4 on: April 16, 2005, 01:05:05 AM »

Quote from: "dbt1949"
Friends and "business" don't mix. Give her book back to her and say "thanks for the loan".


Echo that.  Not so much on the unquoted part.  I'm bitter, but not yet old. Cool
Logged

Xbox Live Gamertag: cstiffler
gameoverman
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 1422


View Profile
« Reply #5 on: April 16, 2005, 01:25:25 AM »

Quote from: "CrayolaSmoker"
Quote from: "gameoverman"
Since she's a 'classmate' and not a 'friend',  I think that's the fairest thing.


Last semester she was, without a doubt, my best friend and partner in crime.  This semester we've grown a bit apart due to various circumstances, but are still friends.  Does that change your answer?


Yeah, it does.  If this is a close friend, then I would 'buy' the book from her.  This would conveniently make it possible for her to buy a new book without borrowing money from me.  

However, you said you had drifted apart before this came up, which to me removes her from 'friend' status.  'Friends' are current close relationships, imo, anything else falls back to 'acquaintance' or 'associate' status.  Alot would depend on what 'drifting apart a bit' means.

If she wanted to renew a close friendship after some apart time, nothing wrong with that.  But starting that off with a request for cash?  Uh, no that ain't happening.
Logged
Autistic Angel
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 3619


View Profile
« Reply #6 on: April 16, 2005, 01:36:36 AM »

Nothing makes me angrier than the idea that the liberals in government feel justified in taking away *my* money in taxes to maintain streets *I'm* not driving on and fund elementary schools *I'm* not attending.  Beyond the fact that the Constitution of the United States doesn't say one word about how Big Government is supposed to fill potholes and build computer labs for our failing public school system, I don't see why I should have to pay for things that I'm not currently using, or that I've already finished benefiting from.

Your liberal college friend is no different: she gave you something out of "friendship" because she wanted to do you a "favor" and be "kind."  Now, all of a sudden, her hedonistic, elitist lifestyle has come crashing down around her, so instead of cancelling the vacation she's been planning for months, she's acting like a typical liberal and trying to find the easy way out.  I know the radical left-wingers would probably try to guilt-trip you into thinking that the price of a book is awfully small price to pay for a strong friendship, especially since you've basically gotten something for nothing at this point, but we right-thinking Americans see this ploy for what it is: a Friendship Tax.

Tell your hand-wringing liberal "friend" that if she'd spent less time trying to figure out nice things to do for other people and more time not losing her textbooks, she wouldn't be in this predicament at all.  Then, spread the word around campus about this new Friendship Tax the liberals are trying to implement -- this isn't the first time those liberals have tried that "Do Unto Others..." crap, but if it's making some sort of comeback at your school, you'll want to stamp it out quick.

-Autistic Angel
Logged
dbt1949
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 2619


Don't tread on me


View Profile
« Reply #7 on: April 16, 2005, 02:23:32 AM »

Don't sugar coat it.Tell it like it is!  :shock:
Logged

Ye Olde Farte
Laner
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 4693


Badassfully


View Profile WWW
« Reply #8 on: April 16, 2005, 03:43:54 AM »

what the hell...
Logged
mytocles
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 4901



View Profile
« Reply #9 on: April 16, 2005, 08:47:52 PM »

I say, give her the book back and tell her you're sorry, but you can't afford to buy it.  what she did wasn't right, and she should have bit the bullet on the situation - not you - but, now that she hasn't, it's still fair for you to give it back, IMO.  And don't be in too much of a hurry to discard your friendship - none of us is perfect.  Think about it and let a little time pass first.

Also, I'd answer her question honestly: "no, you're not being 'mean' - but i do believe you're being unfair.  People do things differently with their plans and their money once they've been assured they don't need to use it for something else, like the book.  In this case, you will upset my plans, because of something you did.  To honor our friendship, and to be - technically - fair, i will certainly return your book for your use, but i can't afford to give you money for it."   or yadda-yadda to that effect.  

Let me know, i have a 2000 PDR Nurse's Drug Handbook - if it's good enough to get you through (maybe with a little supplementation from the library), you are welcome to borrow it, just email me your address.
Logged

Mytocles (MY-toe-cleez)

"Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most!"
- I don't remember who said it, and probably neither do they...
DarkEL
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 2931



View Profile WWW
« Reply #10 on: April 17, 2005, 01:51:19 AM »

For a frame of reference

- just how much do these books cost?

- Have you written in or damaged the book that she "gave" you at all?
Logged
unbreakable
Guest
« Reply #11 on: April 17, 2005, 06:19:03 AM »

Considering your intent actually WAS to purchase a book anyway, I would count yourself lucky you were able to delay it as long as you have.

Either giving her the book back or purchasing her anyother (or paying her) would be the best thing, IMO.

Is it 'Indian Giving'?  Yes, but that still doesnt justify not compensating her, since technically her giving you the book has indebted you to her, be it good will or money.  In my opinion, of course.

[edit] I didnt vote, since I find either of the top two options to be fine.
Logged
hitbyambulance
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 937


View Profile WWW
« Reply #12 on: April 17, 2005, 09:41:55 AM »

under no circumstances give her money, but giving the book back (along with an explanation of how you fair you feel this situation is).

i also wouldn't really trust her, after this.
Logged
CrayolaSmoker
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 3614

Sponge Bath Slut


View Profile WWW
« Reply #13 on: April 17, 2005, 04:51:21 PM »

Quote from: "DarkEL"
For a frame of reference

- just how much do these books cost?

- Have you written in or damaged the book that she "gave" you at all?


The books average $35-40.  As far as damage goes, it looks used, but is in good condition.  No writing in it.

Everyone else, thank you for your responses.  For the record, the issue isn't the money.  Our tax return was good this year.  biggrin   The issue is the way it was asked.  "Hey, Nathan.  I'm a dumbass and lost my book.  Don't suppose you'd like to buy me one.  You know, return the favor," would've been met with a quick trip to Amazon and a book on her doorstep Monday.  But, "Pay me now for that book I gifted to you.  You know, the one I've repeatedly told you is yours with no strings attached," feels like I'm being taken advantage of.
Logged

Wii: 1429 3414 0674 4114 | 360: CrayolaSmokerGT
smokingcrayolas.net | surrogacy blog
Blackadar
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 3458



View Profile
« Reply #14 on: April 17, 2005, 05:42:28 PM »

You are being taken advantage of.  For her to ask you to buy a new one is poor form.

I'd give her the old one back and then walk away.
Logged

Raise the bridge! I have an erection!
unbreakable
Guest
« Reply #15 on: April 17, 2005, 07:36:54 PM »

Quote from: "Blackadar"
You are being taken advantage of.  For her to ask you to buy a new one is poor form.

I'd give her the old one back and then walk away.


Prob the best thing to do.  Just give her the book back and say thank you.
Logged
phormio
Gaming Trend Reader

Offline Offline

Posts: 168



View Profile
« Reply #16 on: April 17, 2005, 07:54:32 PM »

Quote from: "unbreakable"
Quote from: "Blackadar"
You are being taken advantage of.  For her to ask you to buy a new one is poor form.

I'd give her the old one back and then walk away.


Prob the best thing to do.  Just give her the book back and say thank you.


Absolutely. Take the high road..., and stay clear.
Logged

"My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them." --Mitch Hedberg
Autistic Angel
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 3619


View Profile
« Reply #17 on: April 18, 2005, 03:47:03 PM »

Quote
i also wouldn't really trust her, after this.


Oh, absolutely!  I thought that went without saying before, but considering the number of people here who seem to think its appropriate to reward this sort of treachery by caving in, it doesn't seem like everyone quite grasps the level of malice which is motivating this radical left-wing liberal bitch.

Let's recap: this "friend" gave CrayolaSmoker a $40 book to use.  Why would she do that?  Out of friendship?  Kindness?  Charity?  Because leaving it unused while a friend was in need would seem like an incredibly cold-hearted and selfish thing to do?  

No.  This is nothing but a typical liberal ploy: pretending to care for others by providing them with much-needed assistance just so they can get those disadvantaged people under their thumb and keep them there.  It's really no different from all the left-wing hand-wringing over the tsunami relief, just implemented on a much smaller scale.

I'll say it again: a liberal looking at this situation would probably come up with all sorts of excuses why CrayolaSmoker should pay this Friendship Tax.  They'd probably get mad just because he's letting a paltry sum of money destroy a long-standing friendship, point out that he's the one who took advantage of her kindness and is now unwilling to show it to her in exchange, or even try to imply that giving her the book back is literally the least he could possibly do.  Fortunately, the conservative Moral Majority in the country is increasingly successful in drowning out all the liberal mewling and reestablishing a proper sense of strong values, and we realize that a *real* friend would never have given CrayolaSmoker the book in the first place, much less had the gall to ask him for a favor in exchange.

I'd like to propose the addition of a new option to the poll: "Tell Her No, Then Spread Rumors Around School That She's Had Three Abortions In The Last Four Years."  Let's see how much she enjoys her "vacation from America" after the stigma of being a pro-death liberal has driven her out of school and from her chosen profession.

-Autistic Angel

---------------------------------

"Dave, there comes a point in every friendship when it's time to say, 'I never liked you; get lost!" -- Phil Hartman, NewsRadio
Logged
Knightshade Dragon
Administrator
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 21056



View Profile WWW
« Reply #18 on: April 18, 2005, 04:02:28 PM »

All political flash aside, I'd just give her the book to be rid of her.  I'd let her know it too...
Logged

Ron Burke
EiC, Director of Gaming Trend
Gamertag:
Gaming Trend
PS3 Tag: GamingTrend
SuperHiro
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 1199

Pants on Fire


View Profile
« Reply #19 on: April 18, 2005, 05:18:44 PM »

I'm about 80% sure that A.Angel is just being silly.  It's pretty funny, beautifully sarcastic, and delightful satire.  Of course, if it's all for real, it's still funny.  

If it was me, and it was my "close friend and partner in crime", I'd pay up, but give her a really hard time about it.  Then I'd tell all my other friends and we'd make fun of him for about a week.

I once "loaned" a textbook to my close friend.  In lieu of payment, he would buy me a new CD (which was the amount I would get back in buyback anyway).   He never got me that CD.  I pestered him for a while, then made a really stupid demand that he pay me the amount I paid for the book (about $50).  Then I realized I was being an ass and let it go.  We still joke about the CD though.
Logged

Just Hiro will do.
Laner
Gaming Trend Senior Member

Offline Offline

Posts: 4693


Badassfully


View Profile WWW
« Reply #20 on: April 18, 2005, 05:53:05 PM »

Quote from: "SuperHiro"
I'm about 80% sure that A.Angel is just being silly.

...or living up to his name  :shock:
Logged
Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.19 | SMF © 2013, Simple Machines
Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!
Page created in 0.103 seconds with 67 queries. (Pretty URLs adds 0.023s, 2q)