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Author Topic: Stinky situation at work. What to doo.  (Read 2133 times)
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Toe
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« on: September 17, 2008, 06:37:12 PM »

In the past, I would say 7-8 days, this guy from a different team has been coming to the bathroom in my team's area and taking big, stinky dumps. I do not understand why.

He has 1 bathroom within probably 10 steps from his office (with 1 stall). He has a larger bathroom within, say, 30 steps with 3 stalls. Our single stall restroom is on the other side of the building, probably 200 paces away. Our area has the unix, windows, and SAN teams in it, which is seperated by a huge fire door from the front area that has the helpdesk and monitor teams in it. Not to mention my team's restroom has really poor ventilation. Based on the number of people at our location, there should rarely be an issue with 4 stalls up front are taken at the same time, so capacity is not does not appear to be an issue since he has violated our air space atleast 3 times in the past 7-8 days. The same brand of TP is being used so its not a scratchy-vs-fluffy issue. We normally do not have any reading material in the restrooms, if there is the cleaning crew trashes it when they clean it, which is daily.

Basically I want him to stop coming to our restroom and stinking it up. I do not know the guy personally so I am not sure what is going to be the best way to broach the subject. One of the people I know that works with him says he is a rather nice, friendly guy. Here are my options...

1) Straight up ask him why he is coming back to our restroom and stinking it up. This would 1) let him know I am not happy about it and 2) maybe bring to light some issue with the other two bathrooms that I can tell someone to fix.

2) Continue to give him the "wtf-are-you-doing-stinking-up-our-bathroom" stare when I see him and hope he gets the hint.

3) Get management involved to point where they might send out an email to the effect of "try to stay in your area" or at the bare minimum "Are you satisfied with the current restroom facilites in your area?" in an attempt to find some underlying issues.

4) Go take big stinky dumps in the restroom closest to him. I would probably walk through his area with some reading material tucked underneath my arm to ensure he knows what I am up to.

5) Tell management that we need to improve the ventilation in our restrooms (I would bet they are aware of this themselves).

 







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Isgrimnur
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« Reply #1 on: September 17, 2008, 06:44:41 PM »

Sounds like he may be passive-agressive over a past issue or is aware of his issue and doesn't want to smelt what he dealt.

I would avoid number 4, as you risk an escalation over the issue.  I would certainly recommend number 5 to see if they're willing to assist.   1 risks an altercation that could backfire on you.  2 isn't going to work in the least.  3 might gain some info, but unless management has buy-in and is willing to act, nothing's going to change.

I would recommend bringing the situation to either your superior (with a walkthrough if necessary) or HR.  Keep names out of it until you know that they are willing to back your play.  To go feudal, always get your lord's buy-in before starting a border war with the neighboring feifdom.
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Kevin Grey
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« Reply #2 on: September 17, 2008, 06:53:00 PM »

Have someone who is along the path to your office call you when he sees him coming.  Then quickly put an "Out of Order" sign on the doorway before he arrives.  Continue doing that until he finds somewhere more suitable. 

Alternatively, spike his coffee when he isn't looking with exlax so that he has no choice but to go to the absolute closest bathroom possible. 
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gellar
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« Reply #3 on: September 17, 2008, 06:58:40 PM »

Fuck that, Option 4 is clearly the way to go.  Enlist coworkers.  Blog about it.

gellar
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Zero
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« Reply #4 on: September 17, 2008, 07:00:04 PM »

Put up an anonymous sign in the bathroom - something to the effect that Please don't do #2 in this bathroom, there is no ventilation <- In BIG letters inside the restroom.
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heloder
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« Reply #5 on: September 17, 2008, 07:02:00 PM »

Kevin Grey, you've done this before haven't you?
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Kevin Grey
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« Reply #6 on: September 17, 2008, 07:08:39 PM »

Quote from: heloder on September 17, 2008, 07:02:00 PM

Kevin Grey, you've done this before haven't you?


ninja
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Eel Snave
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« Reply #7 on: September 17, 2008, 08:48:42 PM »

We need Amish Warlord's help on this.  smile

I think maybe talking to the guy would be an option.  Don't be rude, just start up a friendly conversation with him and build a rapport.  In a couple of days ask him is there any specific reason he comes down here to use the bathroom and then, acting embarrassed, tell him that there's not a lot of ventilation etc. etc.  If he gets snippy, then it's an HR issue.

In other words, take care of stuff face to face first, and then escalate.  Besides, maybe he comes down here because he thinks of the IT dept. as a bunch of pasty-faced punks, and by getting to know him you may avoid the underlying issue entirely.

It's also possible that he's been chased away from other bathrooms.  By finding out who he is and where he's from, you might get more clues.

I'm just throwing out ideas.  Don't kill me if they suck.

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kratz
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« Reply #8 on: September 17, 2008, 09:03:06 PM »

Every time he comes down to unleash smell, go in and strike up a conversation with him.  Refuse to leave.
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Arkon
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« Reply #9 on: September 17, 2008, 09:16:46 PM »

Every time you see he is coming down, just go in and sit in the stall.  Obviously an out of order sign would arouse suspicion.
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kratz
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« Reply #10 on: September 17, 2008, 09:20:50 PM »

Or go in while he's shitting and start masturbating furiously into the sink.  Make it loud.
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joeyjazz
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« Reply #11 on: September 17, 2008, 09:26:01 PM »

Quote from: Toe on September 17, 2008, 06:37:12 PM

He has 1 bathroom within probably 10 steps from his office (with 1 stall). He has a larger bathroom within, say, 30 steps with 3 stalls. Our single stall restroom is on the other side of the building, probably 200 paces away.

Is the bathroom right by him a single stall like yours?  He might be going out of his way to use a single stall washroom to eliminate the risk of someone sitting in the next stall over.  If his is also a single stall, it could be that he either was confronted by or overheard his own co-workers commenting on what he was doing to their work environment and is dumping waste in your backyard as a kneejerk solution.

Solution 6: Convince management that your area should require heavy security clearance to enter.  Get a retinal scanner put on the door.
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Daehawk
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« Reply #12 on: September 17, 2008, 09:29:01 PM »

Hang and out of order sign on your team's bathroom door. Make sure they all know its ok to use though.
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McNutt
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« Reply #13 on: September 17, 2008, 10:46:57 PM »

This really should be taken up with HR.  Do that and then tell us what they say.  I'm doing to know how HR handles bathroom wanderers.
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Simon
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« Reply #14 on: September 17, 2008, 11:37:21 PM »

Buy a can of air spray and wrap it up with a bow. Put his name on it and leave it on the toilet.
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Teggy
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« Reply #15 on: September 17, 2008, 11:54:14 PM »

Are you friendly with anyone in HR or do you know anyone in HR? My office has 1 mens room and 1 womens room that have about 6 stalls each, and then 2 unisex bathrooms that are handicap accessible. These latter 2 I like to call "the dump rooms" and are the type this guy should be using so as to have some privacy and not offend.  One day I went into one of the dump rooms and someone had left their used tampon on top of the TP dispenser. Seriously. I didn't want to deal with it so I went on my way. The next day, there was a sign up in that bathroom that said "please remember to clean up after yourself when you use the bathroom". So someone told someone about it. You need to find the person willing to tell.
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Zero
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« Reply #16 on: September 18, 2008, 12:09:48 AM »

Quote from: Simon on September 17, 2008, 11:37:21 PM

Buy a can of air spray and wrap it up with a bow. Put his name on it and leave it on the toilet.

+1 on this suggestion.

Why would you guys involve HR??  HR has other things that they should worry about...just make a sign (like the one Teggy found) and be done with it.  So if someone doesn't make coffee after they drink the last of the coffee pot - you would report that to HR?
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mori
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« Reply #17 on: September 18, 2008, 01:48:47 AM »

I do not see any reason to be subtle about the situation. He been around guys so chances are someone has called him a smelly fucker before. Just tell him to take his smelly ass someplace else.
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Creepy_Smell
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« Reply #18 on: September 18, 2008, 01:59:00 AM »



 ninja
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WinoMcCougarstein
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« Reply #19 on: September 18, 2008, 02:26:36 AM »

6) Get over and don't waste company time by bringing something trivial like this to management.  You will look like a whiner and they will most likely do nothing about it.  I really wish this was the least of my concerns at my job.  Sounds like middle school all over again.
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Unagi
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« Reply #20 on: September 18, 2008, 03:36:10 AM »

I can see I am going to have to give you the perfect passive aggressive way to handle this problem.


Remove all the toilet paper from the bathroom.  ninja


Either he can use it, because any of you can - or no one can use it.  Or are you wanting yourself and your team to be able to use this, just not this 'visitor'?
If it's the latter, I don't know if that's really fair.  I mean - I totally understand, but it's still his workspace (sure, not his area...) and he is indeed allowed to use that bathroom.  HR would (at least our HR would) totally shame you out of their office if you brought this to their attention...   "Let me get this straight, you want us to go tell Bill that he is no longer allowed to use one of the bathrooms?  What did he do in the bathroom again?  Use it?"    Equally, going up to him and after a quick introduction discussing his bodily functions in the hallway seems a bit, well - awkward.

I would either just remove the TP (perhaps add a sign too, regarding ventilation and the no poop rule, hell - perhaps even tell HR you are doing this because you have a hangup and are going nuts about the lack of ventilation, etc...).  Or, #4
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TK-421
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« Reply #21 on: September 18, 2008, 01:19:09 PM »

I say you go take a shit in his coffee cup.

But then I'm the vindictive sort with no imagination.    icon_twisted
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« Reply #22 on: September 18, 2008, 01:25:47 PM »

Quote from: kratz on September 17, 2008, 09:20:50 PM

Or go in while he's shitting and start masturbating furiously into the sink.  Make it loud.

Shit, this made me laugh.  Too funny.
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YellowKing
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« Reply #23 on: September 18, 2008, 01:34:16 PM »

Classic Phantom Shitter. Those from OO may know I have dealt with his kind before. In my case the culprit was unknown, but the effects were still the same.

He's fully aware of his gastronomic issues; he's going to a distant bathroom in an attempt to avoid suspicion from his immediate colleagues. That makes this premeditated shitting, and thus he should be shown no mercy.



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« Reply #24 on: September 18, 2008, 02:14:43 PM »

Go on a pro-biotic challenge. Make sure to eat the prune yogurt too.

When you see him coming, duck into the bathroom and use the stall. Make it sound like someone's choking the hell out of a duck and kicking a rabid dog at the same time. If you need some help with the sound, put some water in a kazoo.

Put chocolate pudding on your hands and smear the seat, handle and the wall. Walk out, smile at him, and then leave without washing your hands.

Hide the pudding cup in the front (or back) of your pants. Be obvious.
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Dante Rising
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« Reply #25 on: September 19, 2008, 02:53:35 PM »

Quote from: kratz on September 17, 2008, 09:20:50 PM

Or go in while he's shitting and start masturbating furiously into the sink.  Make it loud.

NOT a good idea. Ever heard of Pavlov's Dog? Soon, any time someone is taking a shit you'll have an uncontrollable urge to masturbate...
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kratz
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« Reply #26 on: September 19, 2008, 02:57:18 PM »

Yeah... 'soon'... heh... um... heh...
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