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Author Topic: Gonegold Conspiracy Theories [fun]  (Read 4436 times)
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RPGHero
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« on: October 10, 2004, 07:47:29 PM »

I've decided to lighten up the mood since no one seems to know, for sure, what is going on.  (BTW, Bill Harris couldn't shed any light either)

After alien forces read all the X-Com postings they decided that allowing the site to continue would possibly give Earth a strategy guide to their defeat.  Therefore they disable the site.
A skyguard would have been dispatched immediately but there was a terror site at Mount St. Helens (The steam and rumbling is just cover for the problems there).  They would have taken care of it right after that but they had to return to their main base in Africa before going out again.  biggrin
A second team was available but lead by CSL, and so was held back as a "strategic reserve". :wink:

(Yes sad, but all the effort I had left after working on a home project all weekend). :oops:
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whiteboyskim
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« Reply #1 on: October 10, 2004, 07:58:54 PM »

I think SkyNet realized we were on to its plans, and took a pre-emptive strike against us. Soon though, it may cross-reference our names and find the new base of operations here. That begs the question: Does SkyNet google?

biggrin
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« Reply #2 on: October 10, 2004, 08:31:07 PM »

GWB realized his astroturf attempts as Dolfin werent working, so he needed to take emergency action by getting the NSA to shut down GG
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Rob_Merritt
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« Reply #3 on: October 10, 2004, 08:35:07 PM »

Turns out Rich was actually John Titor and after he found a IBM System/360 he went home to the future.
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sgoldj
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« Reply #4 on: October 10, 2004, 08:36:15 PM »

It was Starforce protection that did it!
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Papageno
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« Reply #5 on: October 10, 2004, 08:54:19 PM »

Ask yourself: cui bono--who benefits?  Clearly the Trilateral Commission, the Federal Reserve and the Rothschilds were involved.  :lol:
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Geezer
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« Reply #6 on: October 10, 2004, 08:55:41 PM »

I blame the WTO and the globalists.  I don't know how, but it' obvious that they're involved somehow.
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archipelago
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« Reply #7 on: October 10, 2004, 08:59:25 PM »

U.2.K., in an enormous miscalculation, submitted a mammoth post - the complete transcribed work of Monty Python run through an "urban homie" filter. The forums just couldn't handle it.

Luckily (or unluckily - you decide!), Peacedog and Andy have managed to sort through the wreckage and gleaned just this tiny fragment of the abomination:

".......yo, BITCCH! none of ya hatas be expectan da Spanish Inquizzzishooan Possee! OUTz!..."

Horrible, just horrible.
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MHS
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« Reply #8 on: October 10, 2004, 11:23:18 PM »

Quote from: "archipelago"
U.2.K., in an enormous miscalculation, submitted a mammoth post - the complete transcribed work of Monty Python run through an "urban homie" filter. The forums just couldn't handle it.

Luckily (or unluckily - you decide!), Peacedog and Andy have managed to sort through the wreckage and gleaned just this tiny fragment of the abomination:

".......yo, BITCCH! none of ya hatas be expectan da Spanish Inquizzzishooan Possee! OUTz!..."

Horrible, just horrible.


Best theory ever.  smile
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Jeff
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« Reply #9 on: October 10, 2004, 11:26:49 PM »

Quote from: "sgoldj"
It was Starforce protection that did it!


LOL
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SirReal
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« Reply #10 on: October 10, 2004, 11:37:09 PM »

HAL9K: "I can't let you do that, Rich."
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CSL
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« Reply #11 on: October 10, 2004, 11:54:51 PM »



It is obvious for anyone that looks!

 :shock:
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Rob_Merritt
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« Reply #12 on: October 10, 2004, 11:59:25 PM »

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Yossarian
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« Reply #13 on: October 11, 2004, 12:03:38 AM »

Derek Smart burned it to the ground.
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whiteboyskim
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« Reply #14 on: October 11, 2004, 12:14:50 AM »

Quote from: "Yossarian"
Derek Smart burned it to the ground.


No, that'd be the Battlecruiser series.

/rimshot

 :twisted:
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HarveyB
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« Reply #15 on: October 11, 2004, 12:36:20 AM »

Who are we kidding?  Let's just blame the Jews and get it over with. :twisted:
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Jeff
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« Reply #16 on: October 11, 2004, 03:43:38 AM »

Quote from: "SirReal"
HAL9K: "I can't let you do that, Rich."


 :lol:  LOL again. that really cracked me up.
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CSL
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« Reply #17 on: October 11, 2004, 03:48:11 AM »

Quote from: "HarveyB"
Who are we kidding?  Let's just blame the Jews and get it over with. :twisted:


Maybe Jewish Octopi!
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« Reply #18 on: October 11, 2004, 03:52:21 AM »

Quote from: "Jeff Jones"
Quote from: "sgoldj"
It was Starforce protection that did it!


LOL


Nice, I've been waiting for a good Starforce reference.   Cool
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« Reply #19 on: October 11, 2004, 01:23:20 PM »

Oil.
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YellowKing
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« Reply #20 on: October 11, 2004, 01:27:35 PM »

Mystery solved:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk_news/story/0,3604,1324244,00.html
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CeeKay
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« Reply #21 on: October 11, 2004, 01:36:28 PM »

The ultimate question was answered and the truth couldn't be handled so the server containing the forum imploded.

The question?

'Is Smoove_B a she?'
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« Reply #22 on: October 11, 2004, 01:40:42 PM »

Quote from: "CeeKay"
The ultimate question was answered and the truth couldn't be handled so the server containing the forum imploded.

The question?

'Is Smoove_B a she?'

I think that question was answered affirmatively a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...

My theory: U2K and lorax made a baby and it destroyed teh intarweb!!!1!11!!
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noxiousdog
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« Reply #23 on: October 11, 2004, 01:41:16 PM »

I think Kelric padded too many threads, and the forum collapsed under it's own weight.
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JayG
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« Reply #24 on: October 11, 2004, 01:43:38 PM »

Gone Gold has been brought up by Microsoft and will be released as a launch title for XBox next.

Off-topic, Yellowking reads the Guardian?
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hepcat
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« Reply #25 on: October 11, 2004, 02:44:15 PM »

Rich, having been a secret government agent for the last 8 years working with the NSA, put up the site purely to monitor gamers and their potential recruitment into a classified "Super Soldier" program that would leverage an FPS gamers' acquired skills of hand/eye coordination.  Unfortunately, Rich didn't take into account that the majority of gamers' survive almost entirely on a diet of Mountain Dew and Cheetohs.  It was soon discovered that the average operative pulled from this subsection of society would have to be outfitted with his/her own defribulator in order to survive any physical activity outside of manipulating a joystick.  

The final straw, so to speak, of the program occured when, during training, it proved impossible to get the entire test team to leave the rec room because there was a Space 1999 marathon on A&E.

So the government pulled Rich's funding, the site was shut down, and the test team was loaded into the back of a U-Haul, there Lazi-boys still in place, and returned to their natural environment.
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dbt1949
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« Reply #26 on: October 11, 2004, 02:48:27 PM »

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Siljanus
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« Reply #27 on: October 11, 2004, 02:57:07 PM »

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« Reply #28 on: October 11, 2004, 03:20:02 PM »

Quote from: "hepcat"
Rich, having been a secret government agent...


There never was a Rich.
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hepcat
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« Reply #29 on: October 11, 2004, 03:25:41 PM »

Quote from: "Goonch"
Quote from: "hepcat"
Rich, having been a secret government agent...


There never was a Rich.


sorry, you're quite right...I should've said "Agent Omega"
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RPGHero
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« Reply #30 on: October 11, 2004, 04:04:53 PM »

Quote from: "Goonch"
Quote from: "hepcat"
Rich, having been a secret government agent...


There never was a Rich.


Rich/Bill's handler figured that his transition to being Bill Harris under the witness protection program was complete.  There simply was no reason to keep the site up when the new blog was doing well.   Rich/Bill posted the April Fool's day thread up as a chance to be able to disprove any such notion in the future.   But Bill/Rich's handler took down the site to cover his tracks in case anyone went looking for the archive.   Rich/Bill can't acknowledge what happened so their families are safe.
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CeeKay
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« Reply #31 on: October 11, 2004, 04:10:50 PM »

Actually now that I think about it, it is obivious:

Console Gold has finally made their grab for power and performed patricide!!!!


 ninja  :lol:
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« Reply #32 on: October 11, 2004, 04:11:59 PM »

It was nuked from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
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« Reply #33 on: October 11, 2004, 04:37:38 PM »

CG simply ate GG's brain and absorbed its powers.
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Captain Caveman
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« Reply #34 on: October 11, 2004, 04:47:30 PM »

Maybe CG just got GG drunk and put it in its butt. If this is the case, GG should reappear after the shame wears off and the rectal cavity heals.
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Smoove_B
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« Reply #35 on: October 11, 2004, 06:37:20 PM »

I heard someone hacked into the server and stole the source code.

Gone Gold should be released in about a month.
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Siljanus
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« Reply #36 on: October 11, 2004, 07:53:08 PM »

The new, improved Gone Gold will be released when Half-Life 2 comes out in a few weeks.  Of course, you can only access it if you have Steam...
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« Reply #37 on: October 11, 2004, 08:03:32 PM »

Eli 3.2 happened.
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« Reply #38 on: October 11, 2004, 08:04:33 PM »

Quote from: "Siljanus"
The new, improved Gone Gold will be released when Half-Life 2 comes out in a few weeks.  Of course, you can only access it if you have Steam...


Duke - Nuked - 4evR
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