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Author Topic: Are you <shudder> turning out like you parents?  (Read 893 times)
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dbt1949
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« on: September 30, 2005, 11:54:28 AM »

I have come to the realization here lately that as much as I disliked  lot of my dad's......trait's and ideas that I have them too. I don't mind good ones(if there were any in this case :?) but I have so many of his bad ones.It's kind of scarey.
I want to urge those of you with children to be careful,or you'll pass on your bad traits to your children and neither one of you will know it until it's too late! :shock:
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Ye Olde Farte
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« Reply #1 on: September 30, 2005, 01:17:01 PM »

I really admire my mom.  She busted her ass all of her life and still got the short end of the stick a lot of the time.  If I've picked up any trait it is her perseverence.  

I'm hoping that my wife doesn't turn into her mom.   :shock:   I love her mom, but she is somewhat...insane.
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whiteboyskim
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« Reply #2 on: September 30, 2005, 01:41:39 PM »

I have a lot of my dad's traits, mainly in how I walk and speak with people. It's funny because it's very obvious to people other than me, but then I'll catch myself doing something I know my dad would do. Unlike my dad though, I'm not hard of hearing so don't feel the need to speak loudly. smile A lot of my mother's bad traits and habits come from her side of the family and  they will die with her. At no point will I pass on certain elements of my family to my children.
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Laner
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« Reply #3 on: September 30, 2005, 02:08:03 PM »

I can't think of a greater honor than to end up like my dad.  He wasn't perfect, but I couldn't have asked for a better father.
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JLu
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« Reply #4 on: September 30, 2005, 02:50:55 PM »

Don't have children yet but I can tell already that I'll be very much like my father, who in turn is very much like his father.  And I'm frankly proud to be following in their footsteps.
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Szgany
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« Reply #5 on: September 30, 2005, 04:31:26 PM »

I've yet to beat my child, break a brass belt buckle (the big trucker kind) in half while hitting her with it, or punch her in the nose, busting it, because she didn't want to get out of the car and go to school. I also don't drink a case + of beer a night. I consider my personality and parenting abilities as far from my fathers as possible.
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Calvin
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« Reply #6 on: September 30, 2005, 06:21:27 PM »

No kids yet, so cant tell you smile
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Sepiche
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« Reply #7 on: September 30, 2005, 06:26:08 PM »

In actions I'm a lot different from my folks, but as WhiteBoySkim mentioned I'm starting to see more and more of my dads manerisms and speech patterns in what I do and say.  Heck, even the way I solcialize in general is like my folks were when I was growing up.

s
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« Reply #8 on: October 01, 2005, 12:30:07 AM »

I find it amusing that when I was a kid, my parents used to say "what the hell is that garbage?" when they saw MTV.

The other day I was channel flipping, stopped at MTV and caught myself saying "what IS this crap??".


...the more things change the more they stay the same. :lol:
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mytocles
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« Reply #9 on: October 01, 2005, 12:37:46 AM »

Quote
I've yet to beat my child, break a brass belt buckle (the big trucker kind) in half while hitting her with it, or punch her in the nose, busting it, because she didn't want to get out of the car and go to school. I also don't drink a case + of beer a night. I consider my personality and parenting abilities as far from my fathers as possible.

Szgany - my hat is off to you!  It's not easy to stop the abuse cycle by not passing it on... Well Done!  nod

And for the question part of it, yes - I'm already my parents!  But there is hope - you can still get the best of the traits, at least the psychological ones, if you work at it.  I was "stubborn" as a child - now I "persevere" - that sort of thing.  But it is so strangely satisfying to emulate your parents' behavior.  If you don't think it is, ask yourself why you are too critical, or demanding, or whatever behavior you don't like in yourself that one or both of your parents exhibited - it's because it feels good, or right, or it's just plain what you know how to do.  But even the bad stuff has that flip side - that stubborn vs. tenacious idea, or obsessive vs. efficient, etc. - it's all in the degree and direction of the characteristic.

Wow, that's enough of that!   Tongue
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Calvin
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« Reply #10 on: October 01, 2005, 12:54:32 AM »

Quote from: "mytocles"
Quote
I've yet to beat my child, break a brass belt buckle (the big trucker kind) in half while hitting her with it, or punch her in the nose, busting it, because she didn't want to get out of the car and go to school. I also don't drink a case + of beer a night. I consider my personality and parenting abilities as far from my fathers as possible.

Szgany - my hat is off to you!  It's not easy to stop the abuse cycle by not passing it on... Well Done!  nod

And for the question part of it, yes - I'm already my parents!  But there is hope - you can still get the best of the traits, at least the psychological ones, if you work at it.  I was "stubborn" as a child - now I "persevere" - that sort of thing.  But it is so strangely satisfying to emulate your parents' behavior.  If you don't think it is, ask yourself why you are too critical, or demanding, or whatever behavior you don't like in yourself that one or both of your parents exhibited - it's because it feels good, or right, or it's just plain what you know how to do.  But even the bad stuff has that flip side - that stubborn vs. tenacious idea, or obsessive vs. efficient, etc. - it's all in the degree and direction of the characteristic.

Wow, that's enough of that!   Tongue
But do you have kids? I think its hard to "be your parents" until you have kids to compare that particular parenting attitude towards! You know I don't have em yet smile
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Sparhawk
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« Reply #11 on: October 02, 2005, 12:20:45 PM »

Well, I don't know my father, so I'm not sure yet.

I know that the men in my family are all into racing and my grandfather was even a driver up until he was killed by a drunk driver. I do love racing, and I find myself drawn out to my car and the track more often these days. Even if it is just to watch and hang with everyone. So I am probably turning into my father, and his father before him. How did that happen?

This thread is cursed.

That's right. Cursed.
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« Reply #12 on: October 02, 2005, 12:25:54 PM »

I hope not. Let's just leave it at that smile
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