In the words of one of my favorite fictional characters, one Jack Burton, this is what I think of your idea:
Lo Pan: "And when I find her, I will marry her..."
Lo Pan: "..and Shing Dai will be happy and my curse will be lifted."
Jack: "And go off to rule the world from beyond the grave."
Lo Pan: "INDEED!"
Jack: "Or check into a psycho ward, whichever comes first huh?"
Is it bad that I don't understand your veiled attempt at making fun of me! Just for that I will have to absolutely decimate you in Table Tennis! Even us hicks like to play games damnit!
Edit to add...part of the reason I thought about this. I used to love fishing as a kid. I fished quite a lot, but alas I developed a very bad skin disease and so my sun exposure has to be very limited even when wearing sunblock. No it isn't as good as the real thing, but better than nothing. Now if I were rich I would have an indoor lake where I could fish, free from the harmful rays of the nasty sun... sadly I am not rich.